How Storytelling Creates Attraction

After countless IMs and text messages, you finally meet for your first date.  You shake hands, sit down across the table from one another and start firing questions,  “So what do you do for a living?”  “Where are you from?”  You rapidly check off your list of things to say, trying to determine whether they meet the requirements for your next partner.  By the end of the date, you feel bored and a lack of chemistry.  The date sadly turned into an interview.  But what if the first encounter was about telling stories and having fun?  After coaching both men and women in the field and seeing the magic atmosphere a story can create, I’ve determined that storytelling is one of the best ways for producing connection and attraction.  Here are 4 reasons why storytelling is crucial in dating.

Stories Keeps It Light and Fun—First dates should be playful, fun and interesting where you leave your date wanting more.  Avoid heavy conversations, talks about politics or religion or bland Q&A sessions that don’t create connection.  The key is to be in the moment, authentic and come from a place of curiosity.  Avoid prefabricated “lines” which come across as stiff and insincere. Banter should be light, fun and personalized.  The easiest way to circumvent ho-hum interview dates is to break it up with stories and sharing interesting things about yourself like a trip you recently took.  I highly recommend an app called to get you started.  This interactive dating app forces each person to tell stories about themselves with their truths.  It sparks creativity, laughter, curiosity and conversation.

Stories keep conversation going—When a story is told, it provokes thoughts and memories of similar stories and experiences from the receiver.  Consequently, the receiver shares something that was inspired by the teller’s story.  As a result the conversation tends to flow without awkward silence and avoids the need to fill the space with boring or unrelated questions and statements.

Stories create connectivity through self-expression— Avoid asking a million questions on a date and share personal stories instead.  This allows the person to really “see” you and creates connection to elicit more exciting conversation between the two of you.  Letting someone know who you are and showing emotions and vulnerabilities will help you connect with them faster. The more you connect on an emotional level, the more someone will want to know you more and will stimulate attraction.

Stories are memorable and inspire action— When facts and information are framed by a compelling emotive story, you’ll not only hold the attention of your date, but you’ll also make the information presented more memorable thus increasing your chances for a second date!  No matter how detailed your facts are, if your date isn’t invested in what you’re saying, information will be lost.  That’s why if you tell a story in a way that is expressive, authentic and interesting varying your tonality and body movements, the receiver will find it interesting and want to learn more about you.

Remember a date should be light, fun and compelling.  So if you want your first impression to live happily ever after, make storytelling a tradition on your date and rest assured you will create more chemistry.  And if you need more personalized help to learn the art in a wing gal session, make sure you contact me at


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